Divorce Recovery Tips: Part 3

Tip #11 – Take time to enjoy the little things.

 

We often get bogged down by our worries, fears, and responsibilities. Remind yourself to take a moment to get out of your head – to breathe and really experience the life you’re living. Don’t allow your stress to rob you of simple pleasures.

Practicing mindfulness can be a valuable tool in reducing this stress and enabling you to truly live. You can start practicing anywhere – just take a moment to refocus yourself on the present. Pay attention to your senses and the information they give you, and allow yourself to observe the world around you without needing to react. It’s ok to go back to autopilot afterward, but try to switch it off every now and then.

 

Tip #12 – Try something new, whether it’s an outfit, a recipe, or a hobby. 

After divorce (or any other life-changing event), it’s hard to know where to go next. Everything has suddenly changed, and it can leave you feeling stranded.

Embracing this change can be a powerful tool for your recovery. Though the change of divorce is an upheaval, you don’t have to view it as one. Instead, see this is a time to grow. Pursuing new experiences gives you a sense of progression, independence, and self-reliance.

 

Tip #13 – Take steps each day to become a person you admire.

It’s not uncommon to have worries and self-doubts, or to feel dissatisfied with yourself. We know that these worries are baseless – we’re human, and humans have flaws and quirks and all sorts of ups and downs. Most of the time, we’re able to recognize that and dismiss such thoughts, but there are times when they persist.

Firstly, don’t allow self-doubts to consume you. Recognize them, and remind yourself that it’s ok to be imperfect. Instead of thinking of what you’re not, think of what you could be. Work to get there.

It won’t stop you from having self-doubts. But, when you do one thing each day to better yourself, you can feel good about the choices you’ve made and know that you’re doing what you can do be the best you can.

 

Tip #14 – Stop what you’re doing, take a few deep breaths, and stretch.

Our bodies and minds are inextricably wound together, and neither can function without the other. Everything that happens in our mind is happening in our body too – especially our emotions. When we get stressed, we carry it in our bodies – in the tightness of our shoulders, the discomfort in our guts, our headaches, our fatigue.

When you stop and let yourself have a break, you give your body a moment to recoup from that stress. You also give your mind a chance to center itself again. Taking several deep breaths helps you get some extra oxygen to your brain, reduces your blood pressure, and relieves stress.

 

Tip #15 – When things feel too chaotic, reorganize your home to get some control back.

Divorce is a major upheaval, and it’s not something whose outcome you can control. The processes are often in the hands of lawyers and judges, and your needs and wants moving forward have to be balanced against your ex’s. It’s not surprising that all of this can leave you feeling overwhelmed and frustrated.

Most of our worries come from a lack of control. Underneath all of the “what ifs” is a sense of helplessness. If we had control over the “what ifs,” they would be “what if I chose tos” instead. But the thing is, we don’t have control over everything that happens to us. No one does. So control what you can, instead of worrying about what you can’t. Reorganizing or rearranging your home is a great way to do this, and the act of changing your environment will help you to feel more self-sufficient and in control of your life.

 

Divorce Recovery Tips are posted Tuesdays and Fridays on our Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

 

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

 

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by Venn Crawford, Marketing Assistan